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Shit Hit The Fan w SS13

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SS13 has been here for 1.5 weeks. So far, it has been decent with no real issues. He was excited to get here, excited to find out about my pregnancy, and he has eased in nicely. DH set firm limits on SS' phone use, which SS has mostly stuck to, outside of BM and GF trying to circumvent those limits. 

SS13 arrives tomorrow

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SS13 arrives tomorrow for 4 consecutive weeks (the longest time we have EVER had with him in his entire 13 years). It's sad it took us this long to reach this point, but we are thankful that it finally happened. I have been extra nervous about SS coming, especially for this long, since he has been struggling at BMs. It's like Jekyll and Hyde; you never know what SS you're going to get. We spoke to SS a few times over the last week and he is SO EXCITED to visit (and we think to finally have a break from the constant extracurriculars BM has him in).

SS13 Therapy Update & Vent

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BM has been silent about SS13's therapy since she sent the initial email a few months ago, simply telling DH she was enrolling SS in therapy for "anxious thoughts" and providing the therapist name/phone number, along with the insane out of pocket price, because this therapist is private pay only. DH responded that he was in disagreement with using a private pay therapist.

SS13 Spring Break Concluded

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We returned from our cruise with SS12 - now 13. It was a really great trip. SS said it was the best vacation he has ever been on. He was able to snorkel in the Bahamas, go on a full island tour, eat tons of good food, and buy several souvenirs. SS and DH decided to buy matching watches to remember the trip. SS was talkative, loving to DD, and overall fully engaged this vacation. SS turned 13 while on the ship, so we had the room decorated and I brought huge "13" foil balloons to set out. SS loved it. 

SS12 Spring Break - Further Annoying Things

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DH picks SS12 up next Saturday for our cruise. We are busy prepping, packing, and finalizing hotel, rental car, etc. While I am excited for the trip, I am also nervous with everything going on with SS and BM's drama lately. BM has been radio silent since DH refused to pay for SS' therapy, which we discovered we will be responsible to pay if she runs it through out-of-network insurance deductible after further consulting with our attorney and the FOC (but DH didn't tell her that). She threw her hissy fit and is now "punishing" DH by being silent and not providing any updates about anything.

A Cry For Help - Support Needed

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Lately, I feel like I am at my breaking point. We have been in this high conflict arrangement with BM for almost 13 years now. While I have mostly disengaged from the day to day crap, I can't disengage from things that impact our household's plans, time, and finances. It seems like the more DH drops rope and just lets BM do whatever she wants (since the CO allows her to anyway), the more she increases shared expenses and conflict/communication to almost maintain DH's attention. BM constantly claims that she "doesn't like arguing" yet she keeps pushing constantly.

BM Enrolled SS12 In Therapy

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Today is DH's birthday... Tonight BM emails DH (after just seeing him yesterday and not mentioning it) that she enrolled SS12 in therapy because he has been having severe anxiety - BM did not specify what the specific issue is. BM provided DH with the therapist's name/contact information. She informed DH that this provider was "hand selected" by her and doesn't accept insurance so they are privately paying. Session rates would be $125 total per week.

At a Crossroads - VENT

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This post is lengthy and probably not clear. My mind is spinning so please bear with me. 

SS12 visited this weekend. If you all remember, this visit was supposed to occur in February, but SS had a sport tournament, so BM unilaterally moved DH's parenting time to January to accommodate. DH and I didn't have any plans either weekend so we didn't fight it. 

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