Itwillgetbetter's Blog

Im going to try and explain this in the best way possible!!!

Ok there is a baby shower coming up and Bf and I are invited. But so is BM! now we never go to anything that BM goes to she was with BF for 15 years and I feel like no matter what she will be family and I wont so if there was any drama i will not have anyone to back me up. Well anyway BM is trying to do some sneaky shit and she doesnt want me or BF to know that she is going to this baby shower. Sounds like she is trying to plan something. I dont like to make a scene cause i am not that type of person and I refuse to make a show or disrespect anyones party or anything.

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Makes me want to throw up!!!

Ok Sd came over the day before yesterday and I needed to leave the house I coudnt take it anymore. First BF was eating a chicken nugget and she wanted some so BF went to give it to her for her to hold it and SD didnt want it like that she wanted him to feed it to her... Then she goes to the kitchen and tells BF guess what mommy threw up this morning... That just made me sick to my stomach. This little girl listens to all adult conversations and brings back everything to our home. SD told her father that someone was pregnant and he asked her does she know who the baby daddy is??

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My BF's Niece is in the hospital.....

Ok so she is in the hospital she got into a bad car accident. So we have been going to the hospital to see her but we have been trying to avoid BM so that way there is no drama. BF and I went to the hospital the other day and we sat down in the room and the mother of the girl that is laying in the bed told BF " your BM was here and she was talking to my daughter and she started crying and my daughter squeezed her hand". Now what was she expecting him to say? honestly I dont know.

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Some Help!!!!

Why is it that everything hurts when SD9 comes over. My toe hurts, My ear hurts, I cant breath, My nose is stuffy, My elbow hurts,... And all I hear is daddy daddy daddy. OMG Its so hard to care for someone so much but there is so much of other things that is pushing me away. Its so stressful.... I love my BF so much but I have never been with no one with kids this is the first and i thought it was going to be so nice. YEAH RIGHT in my dreams!!!!

Tell me does this make sense?

Yesterday SD went to take a shower. The brush that I brush my hair with is in that same bathroom where she showered and that is the brush that she uses when she comes over. Well She finishes taking a shower and she goes to the room i guess to hang up her towel. Well she goes all the way to the kitchen to ask her father for the brush. And him like the dumb ass he is goes to get it. Does this make sense? Why didnt she get it herself? Why in front of her father she acts like she is so afraid of me but behind his back she talks to me with no problem...

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Im proud of myself!

Well today I got up because I had to work I went and woke up my son and told him to get dressed so that he can go with me. BF noticed that my son was getting dressed and asked me why. i told him hes going to work with me it will be easier for you just with your daughter. His response was you gotta be fucking kidding me. So i continued to get dressed and when i was ready to go i asked him if he was gonna take me to work and he said no take the car... So i asked him what are you going to eat here all day(we havent went food shopping)he says dont worry about it go to work.

What is wrong with BM?

So i spoke to BF about BM being pregnant and he said hes glad that bm is not pregnant from him. and that hes not bothered by it. I told him that i remember one time when I spoke to BM she said to me that she didnt want to be with anyone because she didnt want to confuse SD more than she already is... now when i look at it how confused does she think SD is gonna be now looking at her mother that just got pregnant from a man that is just her friend. And SD was 8 when BM and my BF split and now she is 9 so there isnt really much of a difference.

Woohooo

Ok so SD came over on monday and told BF that she had some big news to tell him but she wanted to wait until today to tell him. Welllll She spoke to him on the phone a little while ago and mentioned the big news. So he said he could not wait so for her to please tell him. She told him that BM is pregnant!!!! I feel so good to know this but I feel that BF is bothered by it. BM made him wait 5 years to get pregnant. and they have only been seperated 15 months. Is it wrong for me to feel good about this?

BM is too funny.

Ok so she sends BF an email today wanting to make sure that they are on the same page for thanksgiving. But she sends the email from a job email so it still has BF'S last name... Mind you she advertizes all over her Myspace that she is a single lady and she also puts up her name and her maiden name. So why in the hell hasnt she changed the last name to her job email. Its going on 2 years.

Damn im counting down to 5!

I dread so much the days that we have to pick up SD i feel like i have antennas because I make sure i watch and listen to everything and i feel so bad sometimes. I feel like im looking for a fight with BF and I hate it. We get her on Wed until Sun for the thankgiving holiday and OMG am I dreading it. And it could be the littlest thing but it bothers the crap out of me. Like when shes over for long periods of time he will ask her does she want breakfast before she goes to school everyday for the week that we had her He asked both of our kids. but once she left that was over.

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