not your momma's Blog
Home Again, Home Again...
...having some re-entry issues, but it's not anywhere close to as bad as I thought it would be. I was very nervous about moving home again, but it's been almost normal. It's making me nervous. The 20 year old is talking to me again (sometimes, but it's something). I actually haven't seen the 16 year old in more than a week. Everything else is normal.
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I Don't Like Saying I Hate Someone...
...but I really fucking hate SO's 20 year old.
Ironically enough, the 16 year old is showing more respect to me now than he ever has (all without speaking to me or acknowledging my existence). But the 20 year old...
Even his younger brother is telling him to grow the fuck up.
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I Should Go Away More Often
SO told me yesterday that he talked to BM2 (to whom he is still married...) about finally (FINALLY!) filing for divorce. Money is tight for him since he's a stubborn ass who refuses to ask for help, so he asked her to pay for it upfront and he would pay her back half in the fall.
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If I'd Been Standing Up...
I would have fallen over. I just got off the phone with my SO and he just let it all out. Apparently he's having a rough week and he's had enough of the bullshit from the sociopaths.
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Holidays and BS
Why do holidays always seem to be the catalyst for bad behavior? The last blow up with the two oldest boys happened on Memorial Day. Today it's them being outwardly hostile, without actually saying anything to me. And putting on their happy faces (as much as these two miserable shits can) when their dad is looking their way. SO said he thinks the sneering and the dirty looks is just their normal faces. How horrible for them, to have all of their inner ugliness seeping through to their outside.
I seriously can't stand their faces.
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Nerves and Angst
I've been in Atlanta for 23 days. It feels like much longer. On the upside, I get to go home this week for the holiday, which is great because it's the only time I'll get to see SO between now at September 30th. These last 3 weeks have been borderline unbearable being away from him. The next few months will be horrible, I'm sure.
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Scary
I know my SO thinks I'm crazy, but this is the shit that terrifies me. Given that his 16 year old is more than likely a sociopath, I can see him snapping one day.
http://www.dailylocal.com/article/20130612/NEWS01/130619842/stepson-rema...|met:300|cat:0|order:1
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Is It So Wrong...
...to hope that Sociopaths 1 & 2 decide to move out before I get home from Atlanta in September? 'Cause, I don't really feel like there's anything wrong with it. I just would really like a peaceful, stress-less house when I return. I don't want to feel awkward or find myself surrounded by hostility if I dare to sit in the living room.
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Dispatches From the Road...
So, I took a temporary job in Atlanta, which means that I will be living down there for four months, while my SO and his demon spawn will be home in PA. This is going to be a tough few months - my SO and I aren't codependent by any stretch of the word, but we tend to not do well when away from each other. Other than a 5-day stretch when he went on a work trip, we haven't spent the night apart in 2 years. So this is a little weird...
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How Do I...?
...learn to deal with these little shits, and keep my mouth shut at the same time? I don't have my own kids, and I've never lived with this many people. Even 2 years in, I'm completely overwhelmed by the sheer amount of noise and mess I deal with on a daily basis. I was raised to pick up after myself and not leave dishes lying everywhere. I was raised that common courtesy is a common thing, and radios don't get blasted so loudly that others can't use the room above it.
Am I being unreasonable?
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