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Boundaries

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Submitted by Toastergirl on Tue, 01/20/2015 - 12:20am

Tomorrow morning I drive back to the house. SD will be in school by the time I get there. I plan on sitting DH down and laying down the law. This come to Jesus meeting will be short and sweet. Here is my outline, and suggestions will be helpful:

I'm depressed

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Submitted by Toastergirl on Mon, 01/19/2015 - 2:26am

I am. I know it and have been in denial about it for months. I am now at my parents house and even though I feel somewhat "free" there is that anchor weighing me down. I don't want to go back while she is there. I can get out of seeing her tomorrow and drive back to the house on Tuesday, but I don't know what to do for next week when she stays overnight on the weekday. I don't know what to do on future weekends. If I drive 3 hours away to my parents every other weekend they will get suspicious, and my DH will be wondering what is wrong.

Thinking of leaving for the weekend

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Submitted by Toastergirl on Fri, 01/16/2015 - 10:50pm

We got SD today. Her birthday party is tomorrow. SD has always complained about the parties DH throws for her (at amusement parks, pizza places, etc). I told her that is rude, she should be grateful. Nevertheless, we decided SD can decide where to have the party. She said she wanted it here, and then a sleepover afterwards. I agreed ON THE CONDITION she help clean. DH and SD said okay. Tonight I told her that when I got back from the gym she needed to clean her room to get the house ready for her party tomorrow. She happily says okay.

Doctor Evil read the custody papers to SD

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Submitted by Toastergirl on Mon, 01/12/2015 - 10:24pm

SD was on the phone tonight with DH. Tonight's convo:

SD: I got the papers you sent.
DH: huh??
Sd: the papers. About custody. About me. I was here when it happened.
DH: they got served to you??
SD: no. My mom. She read them to me.
DH: wow. That's sad.
SD: she says I have the right to know. I do, don't i?
DH: no honey, please don't worry about this. This is between me and your mom. Your job is just to focus on school. Just know I love you and I love spending time with you, okay?
SD: okay.

Why didn't I listen?

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Submitted by Toastergirl on Fri, 01/02/2015 - 3:05pm

Why did I not listen to the people who warned me about dating a divorced man with a daughter?

Why was I so gullible to believe I could change things?

It's funny how I look back on everything and realize my now DH TOLD me what would drive me nuts, but put a positive spin on it:

So apparently my parents are supposed to buy SD equal amount of gifts too...

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Submitted by Toastergirl on Tue, 12/30/2014 - 12:01am

I also blog on a parenting app. One user posted about how she was upset that her bio son did not get the equal amount of gifts/money that their daughter got from her new husband parents. She was furious at her mil for not treating her son equally, even though her son was at her ex husbands for Christmas; he did not see dd get all the bigger toys. She asked for other people's opinions and their situation. Tons of BMs responded that they expect their new husbands family to give their kid from a previous relationship equal gifts, it's Christmas and the right thing to do.

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