DH used to be horrible about telling me anything going on with him, the skids, anything. There were times when neighbors would make small talk about something DH had told them that "we" (DH and I) were doing but their question about "our" plan was the first I had heard about it. Yes, including that I was watching the skids or had to drive someone somewhere or that we'd modify a trip to accommodate the skids/BM.

I say it that way because it’s been a month since graduation and OSS18 has been here three times. This was a weekend all the kids are to be here and DS18 has been here the whole time and YSS16.5 has been here for half (something about stuff with friends and staying at BMs). OSS18 has been MIA except that he apparently stopped in briefly to grab something while DH and I were out. 

Since I told DH that we would parent our own kids, with no negotiation anymore, it means I make sure to say nothing about the skids  in relation to any parenting. I do respond in conversations minimally (I broke a bit the other day with the gym membership) but I make sure to say nothing otherwise unless it affects me in a way I cannot work around.

DS had his HS graduation party this weekend. XH, his GF and her daughter were there. I have only met the GF twice and only one of those times have we spoken about ten words to each other. This past weekend, though, she sought me out to talk to me. She wanted to make sure I knew that over all the years (they've been together longer than me and DH---no she is not the reason for my divorce) that she really appreciates how well XH and I parent together and are a team/aligned on raising DS.