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Recent Blog Posts
Imagine this folks. All was well in Colorado Girl's world. BM was behaving herself and I even saw her on Saturday and didn't feel the need to regurgitate my lunch. I also complimented her new haircut, it was actually pretty cute. Everything seemed to be going pretty good. BM had agreed last week to the new parenting plan/child support order. DH's lawyer just needs to draw up the paperwork and both parties need to sign, and once this happens mediation can be cancelled (scheduled for next Monday). This all needs to happen before Friday or they are still going.
Based on the sage advice given to my last post, I am changing my tactics in the situation with SD(24). Thank you all! This forum is such a sanity-saver!
They finally had a memorial service for my friend who took his life two weeks ago tomorrow.
I was dreading it because I just don't do very well at those things. I'm not the hysterical, throw myself on the casket type, but I just seem to come unglued and droop and I can't keep the tears in my eyes. There wasn't a casket and I didn't see an urn or anything and I wasn't about to ask about it. I was blinded by tears and I just sat quietly as I could. It was heart wrenching.
Pretty uneventful actually, but tonight the chaos will ensue. MIL is coming home and bringing BIL with her, so the house is going to be at max capacity to say the least. SD is coming this weekend for her EOW visit, and my girls are going away for their EOW at the others house. I'm already starting to get that tingly nervous feeling in my stomache because I know how it goes. Before and After EOW's always brings the unnecessary phone calls and txt messages from BM. It's her perfect excuse to call and get a quick thrill from DH's voice.
so here i am
erasing pictures of you
ones i found by accident
the ones i knew i kept
just to be sentimental
now they turn up
ugly as can be
showing me what i lost
showing me what could of been
if only i hadn't been so stupid
if only you hadent lied
if only you were brave
if only you loved us enough to give a danm
she is beautiful you know
but you exchanged her beauty
for a cheap plastic bitch
with children of her own
I just came to the realization that I do not love my step daughter. I don't hate her either. It's hard to explain. I have no Bio kids, nor do I want any. So I really don't even know how to love a child. Since she has been with us I have turned into a miserable woman. I seem to always be on edge and cranky about something. I am tired and frustrated all the time. All I want is respect and peace. Does love come with time, or do we just co-exsist with each other?
First timer!!! Thank God for StepTalk.
BM's myspace page. Based on what she said, I think she has a little hostility towards DH! LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!! She is SO pathetic!!!
DH and I were leaving a bit ago to run to the store. His kids are there for their EOW visit. He gets in the car and says "I don't know how it came to this." Let me back up for a moment. His kids were at the dining table eating. We had already eaten bc I asked that it just be he and I. Anyway, I walked through to go to the garage and did not say anything to them and they did not say anything either. So I asked him what he meant. He said me not even wanting to be in the same room as his kids. I told him this is just how it is for now.
I have to say that after talking to my fiancee about my last blog this weekend has been less stressful than I expected...He actually sees that BM is turning his son into a monster...he won't listen, he's throwing fits now when he doesn't get his own way over here and Fiancee isn't having any of it...I'm actually proud of him! I told him things will more than likely be like this every other weekend...I have disengaged though...fiancee is in charge of his kid and he's actually doing a great job!
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